A key part of any parenting, partnering, sales, motivational, academic or management role is the ability to influence others in positive ways
There are many theories around change management, however most are no more than academic fashions of the day.
In my search for the methods used by those who have proven in real everyday life situations that they were successful in changing life habits of those around them, I found some true, logical, usable methodologies.
The key to influence is:
Albert Bandura is a world leader in social learning theory. He has proven that our behaviour is shaped by the behaviour of others we SEE, and not from what many modernist behavioural theorist believe - rewards and punishments.
The natural human cycle is to:
Observe > Cogitate > Draw Conclusions > Act
We can therefore change how we act, by changing what we see or watch. And that extends to 'seeing' ourselves as influencers.
Delancy is a hostel that ONLY takes in criminals that have pretty much been wiped off by society. It has had tremendous success in changing the behaviour of previous street gang members, into productive members of the community.
Using the above influence process, Delancy recognised that the code by which street gangs lived by [and saw themselves and behaved by] was the key " Care Only About Yourself, And Don't Rat On Anyone".
So Delancy implemented two codes or rights of passage into the program.
What these two approaches had in common was a recognition that one must focus on the actions not outcomes.
Too many self-help programs tell you to 'reduce calories', 'increase exercise', avoid this or that - but they fail to tell you exactly the actions one must take to achieve these outcomes. They in essence confuse outcomes with actions.
To achieve success in your chosen path you must seek out the actions that will make the desired outcomes a reality.
Focus on one or two vital behaviours only - otherwise things get confusing.
Overcoming your problems or those things hindering your success will NOT be done by years of therapy about your childhood or emotional appeals, your success depends upon the actions you take that are vital to achieving the success habits of champions.