After years of success through being goal motivated and plan driven I came to a point where I just didnt know what I wanted anymore. I had raised two fabulous children, built companies, earned lots of money, flown aeroplanes commercially, even solo’ed in a helicopter, sailed yachts, won national sports titles, travelled the world alone, kept fit and healthy and formed enduring friendships.
The reasons, I believe, for my previous successes were:
- I knew what I wanted
- I planned to achieve what I wanted
- I was willing to do what it took
Whilst many people get number one sorted, they fail to plan, and therefore plan to fail. Planning is a ‘habit’ of mine that I enjoy – because it works!
Okay, so I have the planning down. What do I do then when I don’t know what I want. I know what happens if you don’t take action – you lose passion for life. And passion, is a great motivator. After reaching my set goals I lost my passion for life – I had nothing driving me forward and I could not get excited about anything. I wasn’t depressed as such – I just didn’t see a strong purpose for everything – typical empty nest syndrome perhaps. However, not being one to wallow in self pity – I took a rather radical step to this challenge.
I gave myself persmission to take two years to find a new passion and set up a new lifestyle, as a single woman with now two adult children. My role in life needed to change from being a ‘mother’ to my children, to being a ‘mother’ to myself. I did what it took to get back on the road.
I took the lessons learned from ‘The Science of Getting Rich’ and searched out avenues that would release my ‘creativity’, find my life purpose, and unite me with the powerful universal forces. I was doing just fine – until other people started asking me what I was up to. And the next question was always – are you making any money from it?
This is where everything came unstuck. Their fears started layering on my fear [the one I was daily trying to overcome], and I wasn’t yet strong enough to shield myself from them. My new value set was not yet secure enough.
I sort of had a plan – I recognized that ‘fear’ was an inhibiting force in my life. I had been let down badly by other people I trusted, which had serious financial consequences, so that was number one – gain lifetime financial security.
Starting a career to support myself and two children at age 40, I was very fortunate to have had the capability to generate a top income in a very short time. But that was trading hours for dollars and long term, that was not a good financial plan.
The property market was flooded and unstable – the share market, well I just wasn’t knowledgeable enough to gamble in there, and they weren’t exactly my passion anyway. I decided on a business and went for it. I researched and planned meticulously to a point where it was doomed to success – until I started having issues with the software vendors to make minor changes to allow me to use the software in my country, rather than the USA. What a drama that turned out to be – so recognizing that this software was critical to the success of the business – and that a 20 minute job could not be done for 6 months, the risk factor was too high. That turned out to be a blessing – I soon realised that the business was focused around making money – it was about ridding my fear, rather than creating my passion. One year gone – one to go.
So I decided to be even bolder, and purely chase my passions to find my life purpose, irrespective of the financial consequences – I mean, there is no point to having money, if you have no passion [ although I must admit there are a few passions I can think of that I would indulge in if I had the money!].
So on the mouse wheel, I made the commitment to myself and stand strong against my financial fears and just follow a dream. I had one year.
That dream was to fulfil my creative passions with photography and graphical art [ I am hopeless with fine arts] and write – about health, about antiaging, about technology, about success……about all the things I have been passionate about during my life. And what better medium than the Internet. I realised that in one year I could lay some solid foundations upon which I could continue to build over the coming years. From research I have found it takes 3-4 years for a website to really start being financially productive.
So here I am one year on, with a 10 websites, each around a personal passion, and making no more in a month than I could make in one mornings consulting. That’s the problem with having a previously high income – the benchmarks are high. I measure my financial success by replacing my previoulsy high ‘working’ income.
Have I met my financial goals – no
Have I met my passion goals – yes
Have I released my fears – sort of
Have I done something most people don’t do – yes
Do I feel successful – not yet
I am extremely proud of having the courage to do what I have done over the past two years. It was easy to follow a dream, and I have the satisfaction of recognizing my life purpose, and following it, even if it was not financially rewarding….yet.
I have done something that none of my friends understand, or would do themselves. They all think I am crazy. It has not been easy knowing that they don’t understand, but that is a growth path they need to go through. Maybe their lives are blissful enough not to require such radical steps. But I don’t believe in spending my life doing the same thing over and over, regardless of how financially rewarding it is.
Life to me is about growth, about becoming bigger than your own needs so that you have more to give. I do not believe in being a matyr. So I do not believe in giving so much of myself that there is insufficient for me to be happy. I love giving, but I loving having. So I have to work much harder than others belive I should so that I can give more, without depriving myself.
I have found that the best way to isolate myself from the values of my friends was to isolate myself from them. I am very happy I have done what I have, and I don’t want their negativity around me.
But now that the two years is up, the biggest test of all is upon me. Do I keep going, following my passion as my finances are starting to get low, or do I keep on the road less travelled and have faith that financial reward will follow the pursuit and sharing of passion?
That is my current dilemna, and the path I will share with you through this blog. I would really appreciate your help with this, if you feel you can. I believe in surrounding myself with others so we may support each other on the same road. It feels I am on this trail alone. But I know there are others out there that are also blazing this trail. So let’s help each other, and all the other passionate travelers out there. Feel free to subscribe to this blog.
Nicola