25th May 2014

Uncovering the Mystery of Self Power

Have you noticed how some people just seem to have power exuding from them, whilst others follow the power rather than possess it. Why is that? I was just reflecting on self power after a recent incident in my own career where I turned down a consulting engagement because my last experience with this particular client was the only stressful experience of my working career. I promised myself at the time that i would never subject myself to that again.

After 18 months, they asked if i would once again help them with some strategic work. At first I considered it, but then during the discussions I realised warning bells that sounded far too familiar. It’s not always easy to turn away work, but turning this one down was far more satisfying that any financial recompense could provide. I realised that I was also feeling something else – power. Not the arrogant maniacal power, but a deep inner self power. It made me realise that in the previous situation I gave my power away, and in doing so lost control of the outcome. Not so this time. I was prepared to accept the outcome and had the power to say yes or no. And in doing so it felt fantastic.

We are all born with power – during our lives we make constant choices as to whether keep it or give it away. Its like a bank account – when we do empowering things – perform well with our work, make good decisions, lead with compassion, we are topping up our power account. When we let others undervalue us, mislead us in our negotiations, fail to deliver to a promise, we draw down on that account. Its so easy in life as we try to please those around us to keep making withdrawals and not topping up.

I have had a year of massive change in my life – and many of the secure elements of my life from which I drew self power were cut away. After a year of rebuilding my life, I feel more self power than I have in years. And this time, I am going to keep my account in a much healthier state.

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4th May 2012

Letting Go to Get What You Want

Over the past few months I recognized that in spite of trying very hard to get my life back on track, I was still being bombarded with far too many major hurdles. Since I was attempting to instigate a building project, I was expecting things to be difficult – after all, they always are with building. The trouble was, I was having major difficulties that were outside the norm, and totally from left field.

So, anticipating the arrival of a new member of my family, I decided to step back from my life for a bit and just immerse myself in enjoying this new little person in my life. After 6 weeks of sheer happiness, I realized I had to return to the tatters of my life and pick up the threads again. But what to do now?

Firstly, I recognized that after a 2.5 year slog to get this project underway, it just didn’t seem to want to happen – was the Universe trying to tell me I wasn’t meant to be doing this? Finally, I decided to listen, and put a line through it…..at least for now.

I spent the next week reorganizing my energy – not my physical energy, which is always great – but my mental energy. I had tried everything else to get my life back on track, except let go. It seemed that the harder I tried, the greater I died. So I focused on my meditative yoga, on being grateful, on engaging in feeling loving towards myself and my life.

Aghh!!…sounds great, but I had a whole range of decisions to make. Major decisions. Stressful decisions.

Fortunately, I was financially okay to take the time to step back again, but I knew that I was slipping back financially way beyond my friends and family so I couldn’t rest there too long.  But getting stressed out was not going to help.

I decided to give myself a break. I set a plan that I would only make ONE major decision a week.

Week 1 – I must decide what to do about the building project – DONE

Week 2 – I will make the decision as to how i would rebuild my capital – DONE

Week 3 – I would decide where i would live for the next 3-5 years – DONE

Week 4 – I would purchase a new car [that was this week] – DONE

Week 5 – I will decide which of the many income earning opportunities I have that I will pursue

Week 6 – I will celebrate all my successes, then decide which decisions I need to make over the coming 6 weeks….and start all over again.

To start with it felt strange – how could I possibly make good progress just focusing on thing at a time. I normally have 4-5 balls in the air, having just one felt like a holiday – it no longer felt like work; I had the time to do the research, get out in the field and suss things out. It was actually FUN!!! It was important that I keep only my own counsel – as it seemed to be others that kept screwing up my life, and I was letting them have too much influence on my decisions. It doesn’t always pay to ask others for help.

THE RESULT  – Every week I have achieved my goal. These are major life decisions – but by tackling them one by one, and only giving myself ONE WEEK to make the decision was actually an achievable deadline because I DIDN’T HAVE ANYTHING ELSE I HAD TO THINK ABOUT.

It was sort of a freedom to think. I could free my mind to think of nothing else but that one goal.

And the funny thing is, that opportunities started falling into my lap. I would need some information that is not always freely available, and bang, next day there was an email for a free seminar, on just that top – that saved me a week of research right there. I would decide to do a short consulting project to get enough cash to live for the next 12 months, and got phoned to see if I was available for a 6 week project…and on and on.

This week was my ‘buy a car’ week – sure, I have been watching the market for a few months, and sifting out the options until i got down to at least ONE make and 2 models. It was now just doing a bit of research and seeking out the best car and offer available. Then,out of the blue, my son-in-law arrives in the country for a couple of days for work…….and he just happens to be an expert in BMW’s. I was tossing up between the economy of a 318i 4 cylinder or the power of the 320 6 cyclinder. Having driven a 6 cyl Mercedes most of my life, I resisted the thought of dropping down to a 4 cylinder, but my mothers little 318 really gets around nicely, and I hardly go beyond the city these days. I had previously looked at the 325i longingly, with its executive fitout, but it was out of my target price range, so hadn’t given it too much more attention. My son-in-law suggested I look again at the 325 as it was his previous car and he reckoned it was the best he had ever had [including the M3 he has now].

So I get back home and onto the car websites – and bang, a 325 that i had seen earlier in the week was just reduced $3000. Still a couple of thousand above my target price, but at that price it was worth a look, and it was worth the additional investment.

I decided next morning to phone the dealer, and if it was still there I would go down to take it for a spin, and if i liked it I wouldn’t even go to look at the other 5 cars I had on my list to view that day. It was….so I immediately got down there, went for a test drive, paid a deposit and booked in a pre-purchase check. Today, I drove that car home!!!

The message I am wanting to share here  is that when I stopped struggling, the struggling stopped. When I stepped back, instead of things not getting done, they seem to have got done faster than if I was intensely active working on every detail. In not trying to force things to happen, I somehow seemed to create room for things to come to me more easily. There are a whole raft of small things that have happened that I haven’t shared here, and it is only early days – but six weeks is a fair amount of time – and I am having one great opportunity come my way after another. New people, new business opportunities, new insights….

I have stopped planning every detail of what i need to do to achieve a goal – I decide what I want, by when, and then trust the Universe will deliver. I just need to be open and watchful for the opportunities when the arrive, and be willing to take action on them when they do. It’s what all the books on attraction talk about, but until now I couldn’t crack the code. Long may it last.

I have opened and raised my attraction energy. I am happier. I am receiving more. I am loving it!

Believe to Receive


P.S If you have a similar experience, please share it with us….it really helps raise the whole world’s energy.

posted in Happiness, Personal Success, Success Theory | 0 Comments

12th January 2009

Where To Make The Most Money and Live Well

When considering life success, one must include all aspects of life – wealth, living environment, time to enjoy life, well-being, etc. I found this interesting site today so thought i would share it with you. It provides indepth profiles on the income, wealth and wellbeing of populations in all the major countries of the world. Legatum Prosperity Index at http://www.prosperity.com

According to the Index, the top 10 places to live are:

  1. Australia
  2. Austria
  3. Finland
  4. Germany
  5. Singapore
  6. USA
  7. Switzerland
  8. Denmark
  9. Hong Kong
  10. New Zealand

The index considered both the opportunties for prosperity as well as the overall standard of living.

posted in Business Success, Happiness, Personal Success | 0 Comments

7th October 2008

Choosing Your Words To Fit The Goal

When things get really tough it is easy to slip into the negative zone that we all experience from time to time. With the global economic situation declaring that things will be a little different for the
next few years we can start managing the situation right now. And the first thing to do is to start rephrasing your words into positive rather than negative perspectives.

For instance, I could have written the above sentence as “with the global economic crisis declaring that we are heading for a depression that will last more than 3 years“. You get my drift. It’s not an attempt to ignore what reality we are dealing with, but choosing to send the signals to our brain in positive terms. We may need to make adjustments in the next few years – sure, I can cope with that. But I wouldn’t cope anywhere near as well if I continue to listen to every media event spelling out doom, crisis, depression, recession etc.

If you have to tighten things economically, think in terms of managing credit, rather than managing debt.

It may be a small thing to do, but the impact can be significant. Try it for a few days. It can be quite revealing as to how often you phrase sentences in negative terms instead of chosing a more positive spin.

After all, one of your goals is ‘happiness’ right? So choose words that support your goals.

Let me know how you get on!!

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3rd October 2007

Redefining Yourself

There are times in our lives where we finally wake up and recognise that things have changed, and life just isn’t working for us….well not as well as it could!.

These are often times following major life changes – new jobs, retirement, change in family, empty nest, divorce etc.

Each of these events means that some part of our life no longer exists or did not previously exist. Yet many of use do not change the rest of our lives to accomodate that change and wonder why the feeling of happiness has turned to a feeling of helplessness or hopelessness.

For instance, adding a new role in your life means that room needs to be made for that role, and others pertaining to that role – this may be a new relationship or a new job or new family addition. If we don’t adjust the time and focus spent on the other roles in our lives we end up with conflict, overwork and stress.

On the other side, if when children grow up and leave home, and particularly if you were a stay at home mum, your life roles change significantly. The role of a mother is all encompassing. It doesn’t stop when your children leave home, but the daily input certainly changes. Not replacing this commitment can lead to feelings of worthlessness and despondency. You not only lost the child, you lost the role. And this loss needs to be grieved in the same way as any other loss.

So what to do – Reinvent Yourself.

Each role in your life relates to a pseudo activity. By defining your participation in terms of activities for each role, you can more clearly determine your time constraints, and overlaps. You can also evaluate how balanced your time and focus is between each activity group.

This is a time to be selfish – that’s not a bad thing. Look at what each role and activity means to you, and establish what you are willing to contribute to that role and what you are not. Write these down. Now allocate the hours of the weeks, and organise your schedule accordingly. Share your time commitments with those relevant to the rule and state your boundaries of commitment. This is where being selfish is a GOOD thing, not the big black hairy monster many make it out to be.

When we over commit ourselves, we simply cannot achieve our goals. We let ourselves down and we let others down. So set your expectations clearly – then do everything you can to live up to them. Remember – your job does NOT come first all the time, your wife/husband/partner does NOT come first all the time, your children do NOT come first all the time, and YOU do NOT come first all the time.

Congratulations – you have just reinvented yourself….and all it took was a little time invested.

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